The following are MAN RULES. This is amended from an email I got  

Men are NOT mind readers.

 Ask for what you want. 
Let us be clear on this one: 
Subtle hints do not work! 
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work! 
Just say it!

 ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

 When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine… Really. 

You have enough clothes.

You have too many shoes.

Well, the last one isn’t true… how can anyone have too many shoes!